No, not Whine, wine, to make that clear. As I sit here writing I am sipping a giant cup filled with half a bottle of Barefoot, Moscato. I sometimes wish I never discovered that blend. I'm not sure what the proper term is, type? Mix? I googled it now, type is the proper term. At least until I'm corrected. Moscato is sweet, it is a "desert wine" as they say. For me, it's a wine that you can drink like water or ice tea or whatever your favorite beverage is. It's not hard to put down, you don't have to sip it; at least I don't. It's chug-able. No, I do not chug wine. But I am no wine connoisseur, nor do I have the financial ability to buy or try brands and types to find my favorite. Moscato is by far the most likable type of grape and Barefoot my favorite brand. For a poor boy like me it is a middle of the road brand. It's not the cheapest you can buy, but not the fanciest. I also think it's relatively new compared to the other brands. But as I stated, not a connoisseur.
Wine drunks are the best drunks in my opinion. Wine is tasty, enjoyable, social, and you don't have to cut it with anything or do shots of it to have fun. It's not the most efficient drunk by any means, but splitting a bottle with someone will render much pleasure. For myself I'd need 2 bottles, one for me, the other for company, but nonetheless wine is an absolute ball. Forgive my seemingly uppity stance and writing on this. I am but wine drunk.
An email arose today. It does every month, about this time. From Navient, a subsidiary of Sallie Mae, a horrible private student loan company, they're basically the same entity. It states my monthly payment is due. This is typical and I don't mind the email as a year ago this month of February I began a "rate reduction program." It lowered all four of my loan interest rates to 4%, and lowered my monthly payment to $260. Which is excellent. During the summer when I was making a lot of money, I would pay my $260, and then send them an extra few hundred dollar, taking advantage of my lowered interest rate. My plan was to pay off as much as possible before time ran out. Yes, this reduced rate was to only last a year, and next month, that year is up. March 1rst will be my last payment of $260 at 4%. What a deal for us mere mortals in the free country of America. Where you're brainwashed into thinking college is the only key to success from the age of 6 until death. It is for some.
At any rate, (no pun intended) I got another email today, about how my payment is returning to its original state. Where the four loans range from 7% to nearly 10% each in interest. That will kill me. Literally no I hope not, but I'll be in a much worse place. I've had a year of paying a standard,sub-$300 monthly payment with little consequence in the way of interest. Now my payment will go up to nearly $500; a majority being interest. Interest meaning I won't be gaining any progress in those payments. My plan is to try to consolidate them with another lender next month in order to get out from under the monopoly that is Sallie Mae/ Navient. over the last 8 months I've worked on my credit score, although in the last 2 i've hurt it because things at work are very tight. I've had my hours cut and I recently moved out which was inconveniently right before this cut.
It hurts deep down. Feeling helpless. I'm not of course. Perhaps only lazy as some would say, others would say screwed, some would say unlucky. Even still, others would say "you're still ok, and you'll come out on top." I'm not entirely sure where "on top" is, but it is a relative blanket term I am not taking part in, at least in terms of my finances. None of that matters, It doesn't matter that people believe in me or that they seem to know me enough that I'll pull through it. None of that matters. What does matter to me is how I feel about it. And I feel like shit. I feel like no matter what I do I will be beholden to these guys forever until I die. Like there's no end. I don't mind having a monthly payment for the next 10 years, that doesn't bother me, what does is the ridiculous rules and laws or lack thereof to stop companies like this from taking advantage of students wanting a higher education. Their interest rates are incredibly high, more than most home mortgages, and their terms for repayment are impossible. They ensure you are an indebted slave for years longer than necessary.
I feel helpless. But I know somehow I will get through it, contrary to what it seems to my previous paragraph. What bothers me most is that sure, I could pay them off in a timely manner, but I am not willing to sacrifice my sanity for it. I could sell my belongings, stop renting out a practice space, stop paying rent, stop driving a car, stop paying for my phone and all the other bills i have to pay off my student debt. Even then it'd take a few years. I am not willing to sacrifice my well-being for a company who is already trying to take me. Some days I'm ok with paying the minimum until I die so I can continue going out and doing the things I please and piss them off for the rest of my life. The other part says no, pay them off immediately as possible and piss them off by not paying them the interest they expected in the years you beat early.
The later makes sense I know. But at what cost? Not literally of course. I value my time and energy more than money.